Telford Day Redux

Long time readers will know that Telford has long been synonymous with an unexpected and quite shattering turnover in front of a big home crowd.  Just utter the phrase Telford Day and instantly it would communicate something that would evoke shudders down the years.  Having minted the description, we found plenty of occasions to use it!

It got to the point where Telford Day decided to retire itself in protest at our tumble through the divisions to the point where a ‘big’ home crowd was one in which you couldn’t be sure of your favourite spot if arriving one minute before kickoff.

Eventually Telford Day decided to make a comeback. However, in a twist on the old format, it chose to reinvent itself as an absolute shellacking by a former Conference rival, rudely emphasising how far we had fallen.

The pilot episode of Telford Day II: Mission Impossible was last season, when a Bucks team eyeing the playoffs strolled to the easiest of 4-0 wins. Coincidentally almost exactly the same result that we would've settled for beforehand.  

That would probably have been that, had we not lived to fight another day in this division, but no one back then could have foreseen Telford Day III: Resurrection.

It was about time this tired old franchise had a complete reboot, and kudos to the new production team because the latest version is a massive improvement.

Spoiler alert for anyone who hasn’t yet seen the full recording, but whilst the concept remains Kettering v Telford, the format is turned on its head. Inspired casting delivers a versatile ensemble who can run, pass, defend AND score, in the process inflicting a demoralising beating. But this time it’s not the team in white!

Enough said. Five stars!!   

Coming to a ground near you soon

Two words. Miserable Sod!

An unexpected downside of live TV coverage of the Poppies is the possibility of being introduced to millions of viewers as a miserable sod.  

Worse still, numerous friends and relatives who know you to be a frothy, fun and happening guy, overflowing with wit and jollity, see what you look like when "enjoying" the Poppies.  And then tell you how miserable you look via numerous WhatsApp messages and BBC freeze-frames of you looking oh-so glum.

We can't all be gurningly-grinning bundles of annoyingly bouncy positivity like Vince. but bloody hell, how f*cking miserable did I come across on the telly?

Miserable Sod

Digging deep for victory, but otherwise miserable

Wearing a hat.  A miserable hat

God knows.

 

Catching up on emails.  Miserably.

Keeping up to date with Strictly Come Dancing

Silvano finally has enough of my grimness
and steps in armed with his usual overflowing
bounce and brazen cheerfulness and just about
manages to coax a reluctant smile

One word. Wow

So how’s the head today? Has it sunk in yet?  For those of us lucky enough to be at Sixfields, we saw something that will take some beating. Maybe we’ll never see anything like it again – for a few weeks at least!  In the town that’s home to a certain brewery, this was truly a case of if Carlsberg did FA Cup away days…

Where to begin?  So much to process, we promise we will get it all down by about the 6th or 7th blog.  Maybe get the one gripe out of the way early.  The pre-match arrangements were a bit of a shambles.  Not so much the decision to frisk (smuggling in those flares must have been, um, uncomfortable) but then forcing early arrivers to cram into a narrow fenced strip with no toilets and a 30 minute wait to buy a drink. Less of a fan zone than a holding pen for illegal migrants. Not good.

Our support was, of course, phenomenal. Long before kickoff it was kicking up a racket that pretty much held for the full two hours ahead and was picked up very nicely by the TV mikes. This wasn’t your typical ‘big day out’ minnow club, with their small hardcore swelled by floating neutrals, our stands were packed with big bellied old bastards who knew all the songs and had muscle memory of days like these.  Been there, done that, wearing the old replica shirt! 

The BBC, scratching their heads for a balanced punditry combo, weirdly opted for a kind of Wycombe love-in, pairing Akinfenwa and Ainsworth.  At first it definitely seemed their sympathies leaned towards the brotherhood of League pros trying to avoid a banana skin. Not much was said about the threat that we posed apart from namechecking the couple of players viewers might have heard of. By half time their old school wisdom was that the only way back for us was to go direct and “ugly”. Clearly neither had done their homework on this Poppies side, who far from going ugly just upped their passing accuracy and inspired growing belief.

To be fair though, by the end they had correctly diagnosed that we can, in fact, play a bit, and were hailing Lavs for his bold approach.

Before the game, most of us to be frank would have settled for a performance and a goal. When it was clear we’d got both, thoughts turned to could we do it in the 90?  Extra time, wasn’t that when superior fitness usually told?  Someone behind me mentioned Leeds. Nobody seemed to have told this Poppies team.  Mixing unbelievable graft with class and composure, this was a display that tore up the plucky underdog script of backs to the wall, shots hacked off the line and occasional long punts downfield.  

Though there was one delicious late hoof by Hooper that ate up a few precious seconds!!   

The memory of the final whistle and the long and joyous scenes sums up everything that has sustained us through the bad times. For anyone who was there on that terrible final day at Nene Park, this was your reward. Or on a cold night at Corby. Or getting drenched at Latimer Park watching us take on Chalfont St Peter. We hung on in there, often questioning our sanity but hoping and praying that one day it would be worth it.

Saturday November 2 was that day.

So onwards we go for another tilt at a poor unsuspecting scalp (we hope) – although after Sixfields it’s a fair bet that absolutely no one will take us lightly.    

 "Viewers in the Northampton area may find some scenes disturbing"