The Big One

Latimer Park is truly the only place to be this afternoon.  We've got entertainment laid on.  Live music.  At least half a dozen diverse food outlets around the ground and fanzone.  Even the pizza-truck is making one of it's sporadic appearances.  We've a host of former stars in attendance celebrating 50 years of THAT shirt.  The current crop will also be sporting the Kettering Tyres shirt.  Post match and we'll find out which player who may-or-may-not have the initials "E.P." wins Player of the Season.  There is also going to be a substantial contingent in the ground from Halesowen. creating a good atmosphere.

Oh, and if all of that is not enough, there's also a match which will, more likely than not, decide if we are to compete in the Play-Offs this season.

If all of that is still insufficient to get you off your arse and over to Burton Latimer, I'm not sure anything ever will.  So, if you are venturing over today and it might have been a while since you did it, here are a few pointers to help you enjoy your day.

1. Bring lots of money.  We don't give our beer away you know!
2. Buy lots of Klondike tickets.  I'm due to win today's draw and I fancy banking a big wedge.  After decades of failing to win the weekly draw I have won it once a season for the past 2 seasons.  Today is my last chance to make it 3 seasons in a row, and, providing Ken Samuel doesn't read this and omit my tickets from the draw, I fancy my chances.
3. Don't have a big lunch ahead of time.  A slice of pizza followed by a burger then a jacket potato as a bare minimum seems like the order of the day.  Also, see point (1) again.
4. Don't attempt to buy anything for your car from "Kettering Tyres" as I believe they ceased trading during the disco-era.
5. Stand or sit anywhere you like EXCEPT opposite the 6-yard line at the town end on the dressing room side.  None of you have stood there all season and I'll be mightily miffed to find anyone there today....
6. Hang around post-match to show your appreciation of the players.  The ones that have made it to this stage of the season are a decent, honest lot and deserve our thanks.  And we're still waiting with bated breathe to discover if Brandon Barker will be able to make it.
7. If you're thinking of trying to cause any petty aggro today, don't.  You just look stupid and you scare literally no-one.  
8. Also, and on an associated point, leave the burberry at home.  Again, no-one is impressed or intimidated by you wearing a fabric designed for old ladies at upper-class shooting events.
9. Yes, the pitch still bobbles, particularly as it gets ever-drier.  We know.  You've no need to point it out loudly as though you are the first person to ever notice it.  
10. Don't worry, Bus service No.50 will pick you up outside the ground and deposit your drunk-ass back to Kettering.

So, provided you bring your wallet and your appetite, you don't stand in my spot, or deny me my Klondike win, don't cause aggro, don't bang on about the pitch, and show the players some love, you are more than welcome to join me at the game!

Kettering Town FC 2025-26 Mk2 or even Mk3....

Gotta say, I do miss the good old-fashioned team photograph.
Particularly when the names are cut off at the bottom 
by the photo-mounting and you can spend many happy hours
arguing with your fellows about who is who!

Seven Days and Counting

Who'd have thunk it?  When we were being regularly turned over by the likes of  Bromsgrove, Stamford, Redditch, Spalding, Alvechurch, Harborough and Leiston in the build-up to our enforced damp mid-winter break that we would be in the play-off mix come April?

Over the next week we have three home games, all against play-off rivals.  The finish to the season is truly in our own hands.  The West Midlands triumvirate of Worcester City, F*cking Redditch and Halesowen stand between us and an unlikely late run for the play-offs.  Play-offs we'll lose, naturally.  Personally speaking I can't wait.  Games that MEAN SOMETHING. Prospect of a few big crowds.  Decent away followings.  Plus the usual half dozen angry inbreds from F**king Redditich of course.

Win all three and Liam has performed a bona-fide miracle.  We fall short and, although we'll be disappointed, it's been a great run to have something to play for over the last few weeks of the season.

The only slightly negative feeling niggling away at the back of my mind is this is almost exactly what happened when we were relegated from National North a couple of years ago.  We're still haunted by the run of three home game in a week in the last fortnight of the season against Darlington, Peterborough Sports and Scarborough, where had we squeaked a single win we'd still have been a National North outfit.  For at least another year anyway.

Even knowing this was likely to be the case Lee Glover set out his teams for these three games with nine across the back and a sweeper.  We bored our way to three draws and the rest is history.  Relegated by a single point.  One win from those three games would have lifted us 4 places into almost mid-table respectability.  All water under the Town End corner of Latimer Park now, of course.

Pretty sure Liam won't make the mistake and if we don't make it it won't be for the lack of trying.  Good luck lads.