I Have a Dream

Do Real Madrid EVER sign anyone who didn’t once “dream” of playing for them? From Ronaldo’s permanent half-bar at the thought of finishing a league season trailing behind Barcelona, to latest signing, some Frog called Emphysema, it must be part of their contract to say that they (wet) dreamed from an early age of playing for Real.

Never mind that they aren’t Spanish, and have no ties with Madrid in any way, shape or form – these precious cherubs must have cried themselves to sleep at night, desperate to grow up and one day pull on the famous white Real shirts. Not content with dreaming about being soldiers, or train drivers, or even dreaming about the monster under the bed, these special ones dreamt about signing professional terms, training full-time and making themselves available for selection at a foreign football club where they didn’t even speak the language.

Mind you, none of them were every THAT desperate to play for Real that they turned up on the doorstep of the Bernabéu with their boots knotted around their neck, and volunteered to play for the club for free.

No, with great self-control they waited until their agents had negotiated a big, fat, multi-million Euro contract. Sometimes they demonstrated enormous amounts of patience, waiting for many years (earning fat wages elsewhere) before finally remembering their dream and getting paid even more to play for Real.




"Still kind of hankering to beat their whining faces to a sticky pulp!"