Thursday, 29 December 2016

Finally getting the hang of this Inter-web thingy

KTFC Chat responds to the lack of P45
in Marcus's Christmas stocking

Now we've discovered Memes I doubt we'll
ever write a full length article again 

"He, he, he!" 

Saturday, 17 December 2016

My mate Dennis

Many of you will have heard that Poppies fan Dennis Kendall passed away recently.  Some of you may have known or at least spoken to him.  Others may recall seeing him in his mobility scooter, attending home and away games in all weathers.

Dennis was my good friend.  A friend of a kind you don't really make these days.  We were of a different generation, and held almost completely opposite views on most topics.  Today people so diametrically opposed would only ever encounter each other during online sniping sessions, but, back when I first started playing cricket with Dennis in the late 1980's things were different.  Eight hours of standing in the sun, followed by a few hours at the bar mellowed you.  What could have been arguments became alcohol-fueled chats and wonderful late night banter.  I think it helped me appreciate that my high-handed opinions weren't universally held - always a shock to the young and stupid.

The Rushton changing room was never quite complete without Dennis's leonine presence, with his ubiquitous, incredibly swollen wallet - it was almost spherical, his chunky "DK" signet ring and his enormous cricket bat.  The appropriately titled, "Den's Destroyer".

Back then we talked of the Poppies.  Me in the present tense, him in the past.  He saw the odd game, but with his loves of Rushton CC, Nottingham Forest and wife Sue (and, I fear, in that order!) he had little free time for the Poppies back then.

With the amusingly contrary spirit with which I'll always remember Dennis best, he took up the Poppies again pretty much as everyone else deserted them.  He started to regularly attend during the dark end-days at Non Park.  Having stepped back from both Rushton and the world-of-work, (if nothing else, this at least moved Sue up a couple of places....) he, and brother Malc became new, old, faces in the ever-thinning Poppies crowd.

Dennis, Malc and sometimes Sue, saw out our purgatory in Irthlingborough, before also braving the icy-wilderness that is Steal Park, before settling in at our current bumpy field in Burton.  He didn't let a prolonged period of ill-health stop him living life, and even taking regular cruises with his extended family.

Looking back, I'm pleased that I managed to share three of the high-points of my life with Den.  He was there at both my wedding and my surprise 50th birthday event.  And, more importantly, I find myself almost childishly pleased that the only time I scored a century at cricket, Den was batting with me and was the first to offer congratulations.  He couldn't have been more chuffed for me.  Of course, being Dennis, he then grumbled at me to get a move on as we'd fallen behind the required run rate!

This is the 1000th PATGOD post since we started this online blog and I am glad I could use this milestone to honour the passing of a mate - cheers Dennis.

Dennis, in vibrant blue, gamely puts up with Henry Priestman's
lefty musings and music at my 50th birthday party.
Sue seems most amused by this!

"It's my wedding Dennis, so, for once, you have to listen to me
spouting my crazy left-wing views without interruption!" 

Wednesday, 14 December 2016

2 1/2 hours of local democracy in 10 handy bullet-points

  1. Kettering Borough Council meeting starts
  2. Kids singing carols - cute but tuneless.  Mayor even more tuneless.  Murdered "Happy Birthday to you" as surely as he'd emptied a six-shooter into it.
  3. Money seemingly no object in letting new and old Chief Borough Council Officers work alongside each other for 6-months while trousering £130,000 and £150,00 p.a.  Nice.
  4. Screwing the poor over Council Tax contributions.  Tories happy to bleed the local unemployed out of more money than every other council in the country.  Labour and Lib Dems disgusted, but as they are outnumbered 3-1 they are pissing in a very strong wind.
  5. Swimming Pools - generally seen to be a good idea.  Especially for swimming in.
  6. Bees are better than wasps.  The council charge £50.00 to get rid of a nest full of jaspers, but at the curiously young age of 50, you can get a 50% price reduction.....
  7. Poppies supporters would like the Council to engage over the possibility of a Weekly Glebe / Frenchies Field development.  Tories wish to include more options and continue dialogue with club.  Water down the specifics to a more, "steady as she goes" tone.  Nothing ruled in or out, but lots more talking at some point in the future.....One block vote later and this has been passed.  Hollobone speaks as though he's still playing to the public gallery in the House of Commons instead to a room of Poppies fans wondering if he'll ever make it to Latimer Park.
  8. Tories more than happy to let officers do their jobs for them with regard to looking at ACV's
  9. People from outside the Borough pay 4 times as much to be buried here.....
  10. Meeting ends.  Democracy is served.

C'mon, let's be honest.......

".....who'd ever heard of Frenchies Field until now?" 

Sunday, 11 December 2016

On This Date...

We should have known to expect something a little bit special, just by looking at the calendar.  This particular date has been quite kind to us over the years. December 10, 1988 – Bristol Rovers! 2-1 in front of the Match of the Day cameras. Unforgettable?  You bet.  Still think about it, oh, at least every other day.  Twenty years later to the day, Notts County! - another famous win. 

December 10 2016 – Cirencester Town in the EvoStik Southern Premier!

Ok, a few things were a bit different. There wasn't a potential trip to Old Trafford up for grabs, no TV cameras, and a few less spectators. The attendance was officially 135  (I’m sure I counted 134). But so what, we lucky few witnessed a very eventful start.  Not quite in the Colin Cowperthwaite class, but leading 2-0 after 3 mins is fairly unusual. That’s more than some Peter Morris sides managed in a month. Soon it was four and very nearly five before someone in a Cirencester shirt managed to get a foot on the ball. They pulled one back but we were too busy texting our latest goal to notice.  The rain fell,  the Cirencester keeper more than earned whatever you get for being Cirencester’s goalkeeper (not enough, on this evidence). Marcus changed the strikers, we scored a couple more, it all seemed very easy.  So we can add a thumping 6-1 away victory to the list of good things that have happened to KTFC on this date in history.
And Marcus gets maybe a couple of weeks breathing space before the next time he nervously checks his messages. 
Calm down Brett, come back when you've beaten Cirencester

Saturday, 3 December 2016

Ah, Sutton....


These days, to Joe Public, 1989 is the name of an album by willowy, wanton, serial-boyfriend dumping, pop-siren Taylor Swift.

"It really is ANY excuse, isn't it?

To Poppies fans it recalls the defeat of Halifax Town and Bristol Rovers in the FA Cup.

"Now, that's more like it!

To the rest of the footballing world, 1989 is Sutton United beating Coventry City.  I suppose that's fair enough.  We beat a team near the top of what now is League One.  Sutton beat a "Premiership" team.  So, it's no real surprise Sutton's victory is plastered all over the media, and our win isn't.  Our victory means pretty much nothing to anyone outside of the NN15/16 postcode region.

No true-thinking Poppies fan would begrudge Sutton the limelight over that win.  How could we?  Where Sutton do stick in our craw (leaving aside a certain hammering they gave us) was what happened in the 4th round of the Cup that year.

Both them and us had away games against top division opponents, but while Sutton were well and truly stuffed, mounted and placed over the fireplace by Norwich, we pushed Charlton Athletic all the way, and could have forced a replay.  While Suttton supporters had a tiny corner of Carrow Road to watch the mounting horror from between their fingers, we took over Selhurst Park and packed out the mighty Holmsdale Terrace to holler ourselves hoarse.  Yet again Sutton got all the plaudits and coverage despite losing track of the goals conceded, while we got a 10 second clip at the end of Match of the Day.

At the time we can all remember seeing more footage of the Sutton players doing a lap of "honour" at Norwich than goals being scored at our game.  More interviews with their senile Manager.  And then yet more footage from the Coventry game.  Followed by yet more poetry from the Boss, as he was knighted.

And for us?  A chortling, thirty second clip on About Anglia and a pull out in the ET.  Grrrr...!

You know, I think I can see myself....

Friday, 2 December 2016

FIFA getting even tougher!

"To KTFC from FIFA.

Sirs, in our continued efforts to stamp out overt political
symbols from our valuable beautiful game, it has been brought to our
attention by a club we cannot name, but were reformed after their
previous incarnation died after under 20-years, the you have been displaying
a Poppy logo for some time now.

We cannot allow this state of affairs to continue.

FIFA believe a backhander legitimate fine of 10,000
Swiss Francs for every transgression would be fair.

There are three of these accursed Poppies on each badge
x 15 players, x 42 games x 144 years.

Consequently, we require by end of play tomorrow
CHF 2,721,600,000.

However, we'll probably look the other way for a couple
of grand and an old-style toblerone.

Signed, FIFA"