Saturday, 31 December 2011

'11/12 - The fateful account

"It is a bold venture, but the right men have gone to attempt it.”

"Things were not as rosy as they might be, but we keep our spirits up and say the luck must turn.”

“Great God! This is an awful place.”

“I am just going outside and I may be some time.”

“We shall stick it out to the end, but we are getting weaker, of course, and the end cannot be far.“

“It seems a pity but I do not think I can write more.”

Fitterest and Properest

Imraan's search for creditable and ethical investors continues with  a couple of stalwart members of the medical fraternity.....

Dr Harold Shipman

For - Always good to have another medical
man on board.  Perhaps we could let the
physio go....?

Against - we have a large number of
older supporters, and we can't afford to
lose any of them!

Dr Evil

For - Looking to invest ONE MILLION DOLLARS!

Against - Always a danger that Mike Myers will
lapse into one of the dozens of painfully unfunny
characters he also plays.

Wednesday, 28 December 2011

Locum Hokum

The first thing to be said is that any information is better than no information, so to that extent at least, today’s club statement puts a little more detail in the public domain.

Whether it actually helps our cause is a moot point – ‘it would be unwise for me to comment on my dispute with DRC Locums - so you just watch me’ is a novel approach to conflict resolution.

Then we must ask – how much of this do we believe? Some, long past the point of no return, will dismiss it entirely. No one, I suspect, beyond those in his camp will stand by every word. For the remainder, lacking a bullshit screener on their anti virus software, it’s a case of sifting the evidence and trying to decide which bits are credible.

Poppynet’s assembled band of scrutineers will do that very well, but ultimately it won’t make a scrap of difference who’s right and who’s wrong if the football club dies whilst the lawyers wrangle.

Let’s take one part of the statement – the jaw dropping revelations about the full extent of the sponsorship deal with DRC Locums.

If the quoted amount of £1.4m over little more than 2 years is accurate, we are talking about a phenomenal sum for a club at our level. It’s unimaginable that DRC Locums would see a return on that investment even if we got to the Cup Final itself let alone the 2nd Round tie that apparently is part of the argument. So it can only have been a donation, an extremely generous one, which IL engineered as part of the deal when selling DRC.

Now we are told that since the sponsorship was terminated in March this year, over 400K remains unpaid. Again taking the figures in the statement today at face value, that would mean DRC actually did pay a sum in excess of £500K for the privilege of being the main sponsor of a club in the fifth tier of English football over an 18 month period.

No wonder they’re pissed off!

Maybe Ladak is legally within his rights to hold out for the full amount. Doubtless he has been advised he has a strong case. But even with just his version of events to go on, this strikes me as an argument that would end at best in a compromise (and that has probably been pushed back by airing it so publicly) and at worst in nothing.

Now surely is the time for Ladak to swallow his pride and recognise that no one is bothered any more about his endless attempts at self justification. We just want a club to support and it’s not too late to preserve that by encouraging dialogue rather than rattling sabres.

Tuesday, 27 December 2011

Out of the Frying Pan...

All day I’ve been searching for the best way to describe reaction to the latest news, and in the end it’s the first phrase that pops into your head.

It’s not only conspiracy theorists who are alarmed by the suggestion that our sinking ship is about to be towed to shore by Messrs Hill and Rolls. A duo whose record in football ownership to date is not completely unblemished. Their joint CV reads like a Who’s Who of strife, with precious little there to inspire confidence that these are trustworthy individuals to own a club.

And even better, it’s reported that Ladak will still be around, to guide the new board on important matters like pissing off the last unpaid volunteer who’s prepared to assist, or picking a fight with the world in general.

Come on, did we do something bad in a previous life or something? A joke’s a joke but this is getting silly.

Only with our wretched luck in picking saviours could the prospective arrival of a man with a reported fortune of £200m be greeted with such dismay.

The question begs, if he’s that rich, to the extent he was flirting with taking over Sheffield Wednesday (Premiership potential – slightly more than us) why KTFC? Unless perhaps in the fullness of time it won’t be KTFC but some as yet unknown combination of initials, in the deluded belief that another MK Dons can grow alongside the A6.

And then there’s Rolls, ex Cambridge Utd and Weymouth chairman who again isn’t a byword for happy ever after. Youtube has a long (over 17 minutes) interview earlier this year with a pair of admirably dogged presenters on the BBC Non-League Show, in which Gorgeous George was pressed about his involvement with Weymouth and it’s fair to say it doesn’t allay concerns. Pluckily portraying himself as a football lover who just wants to help clubs in need, and conspicuously avoiding any commitment not to flog off Weymouth’s ground if he could move them n to share with Dorchester, it was hard to shake the feeling we’d heard this kind of smooth blandishment before. About 20 years ago. At least we’ve already lost our home ground and decamped in a different town. Or as George would say, phase one complete.

So if this is the plan all along, and not some ploy to force Lee Thorn to up his offer from £1 (£2?), it does rather have a certain logic. Modern non-League chairman, utterly unconcerned by fan sentiment, seeks like minded outgoing individuals, gsoh, to enjoy forming hybrid football club and shared love of eating out, country walks and making money.

But, as Imraan said when reappointing MM, “everyone deserves a second chance”, so let’s just suspend disbelief and pretend that maybe the mooted takeover is entirely in good faith. How would that be demonstrated by the new regime?

1. A clear, legally binding commitment that the club currently occupying Nene Park will continue to bear the name of Kettering Town FC unless or until it moves to another location by its own choice.

2. Settling all debts in full, especially those owed to local businesses and ex employees who can ill afford to be shafted.

3. Rewarding Mark Stimson’s loyalty under duress with a decent contract, thereby dispelling fear that our death throes will be tainted by association with Garry Hill.

4. An investment in the squad in January that shows a positive intent to keep us in the BSP not run us into the ground.

5. An offer to the Trust of meaningful involvement.

A short enough list. Doubtless missing some important things but a starting point nonetheless.

Fitter and Properer


For - World class 'tasche.
Against - May challenge me for control of the club!
The Daleks

For - Good organisers. And cheap to maintain.
Against - Too many steps at Non Park.

Fit and Proper

It really does pay to dig around in the bins at Non Park, as it is the only way of finding out what's going on at your football club.  Other teams rely on boring methods of communication such as updated websites, but not us. No, we rely on the more creative method of information dispersal of bunging stuff in the bin.

As talks of takeovers and new investors are flying around, we thought we would take this opportunity to investigate further.  After much wading through unopened letters from former landlords, and wading through thousands of agents' CV's and DVD's showing highlights of their "quality" players, we struck gold.

Today we can reveal the names of some of those individuals who didn't quite make the cut with Imraan, along with his reasons for turning them down.

Hannibal Lector

For - Smart guy, could be used to keep website updated.
Against - No one would trust the meat pies anymore!

Pol Pot

For - Would take no shit from the fans. 
Against - Now the Shaolin has gone, his
off-field usefulness would be limited


Friday, 23 December 2011

Will Imraan actually kill the Poppies? Part Two

When you read this thread from Poppynet, the answer to the above question is starting to look worryingly like "yes".

Imraan is infamous for his lack of consideration when it comes to being where and when he has promised.  This is bad enough when letting down supporters, but doing it when the club itself is at stake is unforgivable.

The Thorne's?
Frying pan and fire?
Allowing this petty idiosyncrasy to put the future of the Poppies in even further jeopardy he really is skating on thin ice with the Poppies support. 

Imraan, get you New Year's Eve payday by all means.  Pay off your "investors".  Then be gone.  There are still no guarantees if this happens.  We're still playing miles from home in a money-pit ground Imraan has saddled us with.  Our old home has been barred to us.  We have very little money coming in. Stimson always seems to be on the verge of jacking it in. And relegation looks more likely than not. 

And what of Lee Thorne?  He always seemed to us a bit too close to Imraan and "Project Suicide".  However, if he has extricated himself from Imraan's pissing around and is willing to stand up and be counted in the Poppies cause, we can't really do anything  but to rally to his colours, could we?

Mind you, do we know what we would be getting ourselves involved in with Lee?  After all, his brother, Damien was a bit of a terror in his day.

Wednesday, 21 December 2011

Will Imraan actually kill the Poppies?

With Rocky Road being locked-up, baliiffs sniffing around, Imraan not turning up with meetings with people looking to buy the club, and the few members of staff we had either being sacked or resigning, you have to ask yourself whether Imraan has decided to kill us off.

We know the club generates very little income on matchdays due to a combination of most of us having season tickets, and Imraan running the off-field operation like an early-round reject from "Young Apprentice".  If he is not prepared to even consider plugging the shortfall, or sell the club to someone who will, it is difficult to see how the club can carry on.

All of this brings to mind a couple of statements Imraan has made in the past, which seems a little hollow now.  He has always put great stock in being considered a "real fan", and pointing to his continued investment as evidence that he is in it for the long run. Hmm....

Allied to this stance is the fact that he has always insisted he wasn't another Mark English, and until recently no-one really thought he was.  However, similarities are starting to emerge.  Both came into the club under the cover of former England midfielders.  Both claimed to be paying bills, changing the ground (ok, re-roofing a terrace in English's case), insisting that everything was under control, even as we could all see it wasn't.  By the end of respective reigns both seemed to be trying to, how to put this.....?  Liquidise as many financial assets as quickly as possible.  For English this meant breaking into the fag machine, and for Imraan it would appear to be the slightly classier packing of as many Luton fans into the ground on New Years Day as humanly possible.

Because of the actions of many Poppies supporters back in the early 1990's English didn't destroy us.  It remains to be seen whether Poppies supporters circa 2012 can emulate their predecessors.  One thing is for certain, it's going to far more difficult to pull things around this time, given the state of the economy, the fact we're no longer tied into Kettering, and being at Imraan's mercy.

All we can do at the moment is pray that our Chairman somehow decides to pull us out of our current nosedive, but it doesn't look promising.  A while ago we suggested we would happily take Conference North and Rocky Road for the next 10 years.  Now I'd take Southern League at Rocky Road for just next year, at least keeping us alive for a year longer than we now anticipate.

Monday, 19 December 2011

Remember this?

BBC Sport website, 27 July:

Kettering Town to give Rockingham Road proper farewell.

Kettering Town chairman Imraan Ladak has insisted the club wants to give their long-time home ground at Rockingham Road a "proper farewell". The Poppies are expected to complete a move to Nene Park, the former headquarters of Rushden & Diamonds, who are in administration.

"We definitely need to have a proper farewell game here," Ladak told BBC Radio Northampton.

"If we can do that in this pre-season then we will - but if not, later on."

Kettering are due to entertain a Southampton XI in a friendly there on Thursday (1945 BST) and will then use the venue for women's, reserve and youth team matches.
Ladak added: "The idea is to use the facility as much as we can.

"We still have a lease on it for another couple of years - so unless the landlord says he wants early possession we'll carry on using it."


Sunday, 18 December 2011

Tis The Season To Be Jolly (Yeah Right)

This wretched season already feels never ending, like a bad dream or an interminable series of Strictly Come Dancing, which like our current campaign also kicked off months ago and has been tormenting me ever since, hogging the house’s only decent telly and threatening the end of society itself by feeding Robbie Savage’s already grotesquely huge ego.

So rapidly did pre-season optimism crumble after that fleeting high against Newport, it is already two months since our last win and a month since we were permitted even the most basic human right of the follower of a struggling team - being able to demand wholesale changes!

Instead, in that peculiar parallel universe we now inhabit, players who would normally be chased out of the car park by angry fans are accorded hero status for not yet deserting the club. Apart from the one who has quit the game due to depression! Only the good taste for which Patgod is renowned prevents us from reaching for an easy punchline there.

If this is the road ahead, expect to see more rousing ovations after we earn an occasional point, Pat Noubissie crowned the new “Mr Kettering” because he can trace his Poppies career all the way back to Rockingham Road, and a team composed entirely of youngsters who don’t like 90s music because it’s the stuff their parents listen to.

Meanwhile, in his noble quest for positives to take from every fresh disaster, Stimmo will take heart from the calmness under pressure showed by the Ise Lodge under 7s in the half time penalty shoot out.

Still, could be worse. With the Bath game now out of the way, we can look forward to an easy run of games featuring Luton, Luton, Wrexham and Gateshead. The latter’s trip to NP next month could even provide an answer to that old metaphysical poser – if a team scores a goal but there is no one in the away end to hear it, is it really a goal?

Plus January offers the exciting prospect of real 6 pointers against Telford and Lincoln. Win both of those and, who knows, we could end the month still with daylight between us and Alfreton!

So now is not the time for faint hearts. “We few, we happy few. We band of brothers”. Yes they may be the Ifil brothers, but at least they’re not the Chuckles (not interested in a loan deal, apparently). There’s everything still to play for. The OWS has just been updated to say that Santa’s elves also owe us a load of presents that were agreed in pre-season, and our legal advice is we have a very strong case if they’re not delivered by the 25th.

So with that imminent injection of cash, smellies and colourful knitwear we have every hope of getting the embargo lifted in time to give us maybe an outside chance of finishing at least third from bottom. And then perhaps if Darlo and - who knows -Stockport get the chop at the AGM Cup we may yet do a Forest Green (or, for older readers, Welling).

Happy Christmas everyone!

Saturday, 17 December 2011

Goodbye Mr McKenzie*

In a season of curious occurrences, Leon McKenzie's brief Poppies career is certainly up there.  As with a considerable number of players released from the Cobblers, Leon trudged down the well-worn path to the Poppies to eke out a few more footballing paydays.

Despite being almost terminally injury prone he has managed to play a handful of games and grab a few goals.  He has perhaps wisely announced his retirement due to those continual injuries and brought down the curtain on his career with today's game with Bath.

"OOOF!"  How did you enjoy non-league Leon?
I don't want to be a party pooper.  Leon may well be a decent bloke, but the over-the-top reaction to the departure of a player with so few games for the Poppies has left me bemused.  We have had players who have sweat blood in a Poppies shirt for several years who have disappeared without so much as a mention.  Some great Poppies stars have been allowed to slip away without us having the chance to bid them farewell, and yet after less than half a season Leon managed to secure a Poppies testimonial.

OK, not an actual testimonial as such, but one might be forgiven for thinking this is what we witnessed this afternoon.  Captain for the day.  Comes on the pitch with his kids.  Takes the applause and ovation at the final whistle, and receives a guard of honour from his teammates.  In keeping with a testimonial, the game just drifted and bobbled along, and to be honest Leon should have been removed in favour of a front two of KHM and JD with a good half hour to go.  Stimson, I never realised you were such a softie!  Let's just hope Leon doesn't expect to bank the takings today too!  He'll come up against a bunch of belligerent Ladaks!

I hope Leon enjoyed his brief stint with us and has success in his future endeavours, even if his career with us didn't amount to more than the merest of footnotes in Poppies history.

* the other Goodbye Mr McKenzie were, of course, the ace Scot's rockers of the late '80's and early '90's =

They say you never see a poor bookie.....

....and no wonder!  Even when they seem to drop a bit of a bollock with their odds, they still come out smelling of, well, my money!  I hate to think how many of us took a bit of a bigger than normal flutter on a Poppies win against Bath.  But, given the very generous 11/2 odds being offered for a home win I fear a few of us may be looking at a slightly thinner Christmas than anticipated. 

Yes, I know home wins have been as thin or the ground this season as kept promises from Imraan, but still.....surely a practically full strength Poppies could beat lowly Bath, who haven't won away from home all season?

Perhaps we could have won had we decided to start playing before 4.30, because before then I'm not sure their 'keeper even saw the ball, let alone had to save it!

Such was our non-performance for the first 80 minutes I would seriously consider suing the players for loss of earnings - were it not for the fact that they are likely to be doing the same thing!

Wednesday, 14 December 2011

£19 quid to watch Luton! It's a disgrace!

Understandably most people have taken a dim view at the news that adult tickets for the forthcoming game with Luton will cost an eye-watering £19.00.  Well, a dim view amongst Luton fans anyway.  We've all got season tickets!

However, for those few amongst our readership with nothing better to do than wonder where all these enormous £19.00 entrance fees will go, we have found this breakdown, hastily scribbled on a discarded cigarette packet outside the Director's lounge.

£19.00 - Entrance Fee

£7.00 - Police Costs (could be extra if they actually get out of their van)
£5.00 - Rent to Cousins
£3.00 - Imraan's cut
£1.50 - Legal costs for Imraan's ongoing spat with James Caan over the billion pound sponsorship deal agreed with DRC Locums just before he sold up

£1.00 - Jay and Ray's cut

70p - Part payment of JP's Corby wages

36p - Second class stamp so Imraan can post his latest homework to his correspondence course covering rudimentary book-keeping, and suck-it-and-see financial planning
25p - Retainer for Morrell's dubious services

10p - Rent to Pickering
5p - Irthlingborough ducking stool upkeep
3p - Replenishing the toilet paper for the first time since the Direones left.
1p - Player's wages


£18.95 - Imraan's last payday
5p - Big, double layer bin bag for Imraan to fill with money and sling over his shoulder at 5.55PM on New Years Day.

Sunday, 11 December 2011

Oh No! You!! Don't!!!

At times like this we need some festive cheer. Something to raise the spirits and remind us of what it feels like to be happy. Let’s face it, Kettering needs a lift.

Instead, starting Tuesday, it gets Neil and Christine Hamilton appearing in Cinderella at the Lighthouse Theatre. Haven’t we suffered enough?

Mind you, after a couple of weeks of making an arse of themselves in front of parties of schoolkids who’d rather be at home with their Playstations, and care home residents bussed in from Burton Latimer, the Hamiltons might equally be rueing their luck. It will feel a long way from the Ritz in Paris and other treats which they enjoyed in the days when hubby was selling parliamentary questions rather than tickets for the Thursday matinee show.

Almost as traditional as panto itself are the wonderful ‘reminders’ that appear under the names of the celebrity performers, to help the 99.91% of the population to whom they mean absolutely nothing. “Tinky Winky in Teletubbies”, “BBC Radio Cornwall breakfast DJ”, “Once appeared on Stars In Their Eyes” etc. Whilst arguably this is unnecessary in the case of the Hamiltons, it would be a pity not to see “Disgraced former minister and his ghastly wife” on the promos.

Any undiscerning punters who attend the show can expect to witness at least some acting pedigree on display. After all, he had a good try at pretending to be innocent, when lying all the way through the cash for questions investigation. There should also be a regulation number of awful lines about MPs expenses and brown envelopes shoehorned into the script until it cries for mercy. Plus, as Baron Hardup, he will at least give local football fans a name they can relate to.

Saturday, 10 December 2011

Best of luck to the team today at Gateshead

Crap draw, at the worst possible time,
but all the best for today boys!

There's a Happy Meal in it if you win!

There's always a bright side to any situation

Obviously the Club's present struggles have been well documented, and no one can take pleasure from our precarious position.  It is grim, and there's no getting away from the air of desperate concern around the place.

However, here at PATGOD we couldn't be happier.  Misery seems to bring out the inner-writers amongst the Poppies faithful.  We are being inundated with unsolicited articles (well, three), which we can cut and paste on here, allowing us more free time for Christmas shopping with the missus's.  Hmm.  We haven't thought that one through very well.....

So with the future of the club hanging in the balance (allegedly), we thought we’d catch up with Chairman Imraan Ladak and find out how negotiations are going...... Unlike Trust Chairman, we at PATGOD found our call being taken first time but just as with said Trust Chairman we decided to put the conversation straight into the public domain. So here goes

PG: So Imraan what’s happening with the club now?

IL: Well as you know I’m trying to put together a deal to sell the club and at the moment we have two bidders.

PG: That’s very interesting Imraan....

IL: Arefa quick ring Dunham and tell him that we’ve now got 3 interested parties. You won’t regret this PATGOD the club’s got a great history and under your leadership a great future as well.

PG: But Imraan we don’t want to buy the club we just want to know how negotiations are going.

IL: Well PATGOD owning a football is a great experience, a chance to bond with the fans and tell them that you’re one of them. Once you’ve done that you can pretty much do want you want and they’ll go along with you.

PG: So are you saying that calling yourself a fan was just to get those present at the Wicksteed meeting to go along with the NP move?

IL: No, no that’s not the case at all. To be honest when I arrived at Wicksteed that fateful Friday I was very much undecided about what the right course of action was. It was only when I saw the ground swell of public opinion in favour of the move that I felt we had to give it a go. And of course, that ground swell didn’t include the large number of fans who weren’t able to make it that night. When you add them into the mix it was an overwhelming majority.

PG: But Imraan no one could describe the move to NP as a success?

IL: The move to NP has been a great success.

PG: Now you’re just kidding aren’t you Imraan because it hasn’t been a success.

IL: No it’s been a success. The club now has a secure future with a 25 year lease and I have something I can sell.
Somewhere under stately Ladak Manor, the
Bat phone is ringing!

PG: So how are negotiations going?

IL: Well as you know there are two three interested parties and whilst I don’t want any money for my shares I need to look after Ray & Jay. Obviously as fan first and foremost – did you get that? – I want to sell to the right person but unfortunately Ray & Jay need some cash. After all they’ve put in millions of pounds.

PG: Is that right Imraan, so how much have they actually put in?

IL: Well like I said they’ve put in a considerable amount of money and I’m just glad that we’ve got three serious bidders which means that I can negotiate hard to get the price up.

PG: So Imraan what does the future hold for yourself if you do sell the club?

IL: Well I’m going to take some time out, I’ve promised to take the missus on holiday with the sale proceeds. Do poundland have a travel agency? Then when I’m back I thought I could have an end of season bash with all the players who we’ve given such a fabulous opportunity to this year.

PG: Do you think you’re still ok with them given that you haven’t paid them?

IL: Oh no, lets put that one to bed straight away. It isn’t me that hasn’t paid them, it’s all the people I’ve blamed before and of course now I can add in to the mix John Dunham. I did tell him straight that it was his fault as well as the Evening Telegraph but he said he wouldn’t publish the interview if I didn’t retract it. Well now the truth is out there and I have to thank PATGOD for giving me the platform.

PG: Any final thoughts Imraan before you go?

IL: Yes I just want to reiterate that there’s no personal pleasure in owning a football club.....What’s that? Oh yeah tell Lee Thorne there’s nothing better....

Monday, 5 December 2011

Nathan's Notebook

At the risk of flogging an idea into the ground, Mr Koo-Boothe has been in touch.......

Hi guys

I thought I'd drop you a quick line to wish you all the luck in the world for the future.  I'm sorry I couldn't hang around and at least fill a shirt be a linchpin of the Poppies fightback.

But when a team like my new Spanish one came knocking on my door I knew there was no way I could miss out on this opportunity of a lifetime.  They tell me that I am the final part of their team jigsaw, and that I can be a major player in their continued success.

Here's to the future!

The Benidorm 1st XI can't wait to welcome their new cast member

Sunday, 4 December 2011

We're All In This Together

With some negative people spreading unnecessary and frankly unhelpful rumours lately, we're all indebted to Mr Ladak for breaking his silence and giving us an update on the club’s position.

So what do we know now?

1. We’re still owed 150K by a sponsor, and if we get the whole amount, preferably in a great big suitcase, by tomorrow morning, the players will get paid, otherwise they won’t get a penny, which is all they deserve anyway for being so poor.

2. It’s not just Imraan who’s feeling this pain, it’s his fellow investors too. Initially I thought he said Jay Kay, which just made me feel even worse – the Jamiroquai frontman surely serves better than to see part of his fortune disappear because of us. Obviously it’s still pretty gutting that poor Jay and Ray maybe won’t recover the money they sunk into KTFC, which is rotten luck when you consider how much profit can usually be made out of investing in non-League football.

3. Top marks to Imraan, he’s big enough to admit he made mistakes in his detailed planning. There was a slight over estimate, give or take 250%, of how many fans would embrace the move to Irthlingborough. The team failed to win all of their opening 15 fixtures, despite occasionally looking good in pre-season against half hearted opposition. Local businesses, completely against expectations, didn’t jam the Nene Park switchboard with corporate bookings, opting instead to save their cash to keep themselves afloat in a recession. However it was good to see that Imraan had no regrets on the really key decision – his choice of manager. Thank goodness he got that one right!

4. The Conference will be technically in breach of their own rules if they don’t allow us to sign schoolkids to enable us to be hit for 9 or 10 this side of 2012. Imraan has written to them to point this out, and with all the credit and goodwill he has stored up at Conference HQ, there’s no way they’ll put his letter at the bottom of a very large pile.

5. Poppies legend Nathan Koo Booth has moved on. Apparently to Spain, presumably as part of a cultural exchange involving Jamie Navarro. We hope he enjoys his stay at Real Madrid and is just as big a hit.

6. Imraan will sell the club just as soon as the right person comes along with a real plan. Obviously it will have to be an improvement on what's already in place, a tall order you might think. Luckily we have the answer if any prospective buyer is short of writing material...

Saturday, 3 December 2011

Just how close are Kettering to going bust?

On one side we have players not being paid.  Money owed to Craw£ey, leading to a transfer embargo, so we can't even register youth players to represent the first team.

Bucket collections to give the players a few bob in travel expenses.

Groundsman not paid.  Rumours abounding that none of the club suppliers are being paid and that winding-up orders are being readied.

Is the rent being paid?  Will the first we know is when we turn up at Non Park to find the gates locked?

We're running low on players, and the thumpings are starting to arrive.

On the other side we have our owner, telling us that once an outstanding sponsorship contribution has been received we should be OK.  This is the same owner who during what may prove to be his last communication with us at Wicksteed Park, convinced us that the move to Non Park would solve all our problems.  We had new sponsors lined up.  We would attract better players.  Off field facilities would fund the club operations.  Amazingly he also suggested that players would cost us less, as they generally wanted more money to play at dilapidated Rockingham Road!

No time to run the club properly, but plenty of time
to f**k around with stupid photographs.
He told us that the annual budget of £750,000 was made up of £150,000 from us via gate receipts, with sponsorship, other "revenue streams", and the Ladak family providing the rest.  Well, with a thousand season tickets (his figure) sold before the kick-off at £200.00 a pop, we did our bit surely?  And another thing, the £200.00 season ticket, whilst being good value, wasn't the enormous bargain the club made it out to be.  Last season a terrace season ticket was £230.00, and even the £30.00 saving on last year's price was soon swallowed up by a £25.00 parking season ticket charge!

Is it our fault the club don't have the ability to secure sponsorship?  If this is the case surely it is down to the Ladak family to plug the shortfall THAT THEY HAVE CAUSED!  Does Imraan intend to finish the Club?  Are we going to lose another capable Manager because of his antics?  If someone else is looking to take on the Club is he standing in the way by trying to recoup some of the money he has spent here ?(obviously not this season)

As a club we have survived numerous chancers, fools and crooks masquerading as Chairmen.  Surely the most financially robust owner we have ever had isn't going to be the one to kill us for want of a few quid? 
He should step up, if not for himself, the club or the fans, at least to keep his online detractors quiet for five minutes.....

Friday, 2 December 2011

Message from Moses

Hi guys.

You're right, the drive up to
York is a journey, man!"
Jus fort id drop you a line to say no ard feelins for the way fings turned up wiz you guys, lol.  I's a big enuff man to admit i'm the best geezer you ever ad at Ketrin, an youll all miss me soon, lol.

dont know much about Yurk City except bleedin long way from home, lol.  I expect i'll be the best player here soon enuff, lol.  Who knows,  may even score another goal befor too long, lol. Peraps 2moro!  Ha ha, lol.

An another fing - I coulda wiped the floor with Marna if I had wanted to, lol.  I coulda took is ass out ANYTIME i wanted, lol.  It may have looked like he was giving me a mutha of a pasting, but vats cause im a peacible guy, lol.  If i wanted i coulda capped his sorry ass, lol.

Gotta run, lol.  Peace, guys!  lol.

Oh, and Imraan, if you reading dis - you still owe me a big wedge, man an I'm more than redy to beat it outta your sorry skinny ass, lol.

Respect, Moses lol.

p.s. lol.