Friday, 18 April 2014

Eze does it

As the season comes nicely to the boil (a.k.a. squeaky bum time) we are finding ourselves assaulted by an ever-increasing number of calls upon our attention when entering Latimer Park.

"Programmes, get your programmes!"

"Klondikes, get your Klondikes!"

Trust Bucket.

CVA Bucket.

Trust Summer Draw.

Recently we have found our new, very bright and shiny burger bar catching the eye too.

Last Saturday we also had "Player of the Season" slips to fill in.  Whilst some people decided to take the form away with them to, no doubt ponder their decision in the comfort and quiet of their studies at home, over a fine single malt, I grabbed a pen and filled in my form then and there. I don't have a study.  And don't like whisky.

There are an awful lot of Poppies players who deserve to be in the mix for PoS.  Any of the back four of Eze, Kinniburgh, Hull or Clifton are bound to rack up a few votes.  Jepson and Gooding should get a lot of nods.  Moreman, Sandy and Ogbonna are also likely to receive votes too.

I have decided to go for Henry Eze again.  He won a multitude of awards last season, when, to be honest, anyone who turned up with boots had a better-than-even chance of playing.  But this year, despite the presence of more quality players in the squad, to my mind Henry is still head and shoulders our best player.

Any of the others could be rested, banned or benched without damaging the overall effectiveness of the team, but Eze's absence would leave a big (unit) hole in our team.  But the best thing about Henry is that you know exactly what you will get from him.  Not just a woolly concept such as a whole-hearted performance, or showing 100% commitment.  No, I mean you know SPECIFICALLY what you'll get from him.

Guaranteed every game: -

A big Henry slice when the ball bobbles violently over his head from a dodgy kick, usually at a painfully inopportune moment.  It always helps if he gets this sliced kick out of the way early in the game.

Henry will launch a one-man surge down field which will take all 11 opponents, and most of their substitutes and management team to finally halt.

Henry will win every header at corners at both ends.  Worryingly our goal is often at more risk than the opposition's one.

Henry will attempt at least one over-head kick.

Henry will head at least one ball that an opponent will try to kick.

Henry will back-head at least one ball per game to the keeper.  Sometimes they even expect it!

Henry will perform at least one full length diving tackle which somehow causes the ball to be launched at least a quarter of a mile.

"Eze, Eze, Eze"

It's as Eze as that!

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