It doesn't mean that you are a better fan if you completely lose your sh1t whenever we lose, it really doesn't. Demanding sackings with monotonous regularity doesn't make you look like a footballing guru - it makes you look like a tool . Instead, perhaps, take a deep breathe, step back and reevaluate your life priorities. If the result of 90 minutes of young men running around a field leaves you in a state of complete blinding madness, perhaps you should consider whether football is for you?
Presumably you do know that these mad, destructive thoughts aren't just in your head? You do know that when you type something on social media it is read by others? Surely?
Fortunately, these days, thanks to the utterly obscene amount of dodgy money flooding into the Premier League from the more unsavoury parts of the world, a solution is at hand for fans who simply cannot handle losing.
Click here for footballing heaven
Thank God you now have a choice to support a team that is pretty much guaranteed not to leave you screamingly agitated at 4.45PM. No more annoying away defeats. No more disappointments. No more players earning less than a million pounds a month. Bliss. Now you can look at other areas of your life you can blow a gasket at - your Neighbours? Work? Family? Random strangers in the street? A female Doctor Who? Having to wait a year for the next season of "Game of Thrones"
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| Prince Harry and Meghan Markle are ready to welcome you to a perfectly safe footballing environment. |
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