Saturday 17 February 2024

The Third, Last Throw of the Dice

After drafting in additional players and trawling our back-catalogue of managerial bods with only Richard Lavrey picking up the telephone, the club has taken the further ambitious step of sacking all the supporters and drafting in a replacement crowd for today's game.

Having tried most other permutations to win a home game the Board have taken the bold move of releasing all 700 hardcore Poppies supporters and moving into the loan market for an entirely new crowd for the visit of Leamington.

The previous supporters have taken to Twitter with the following message -

"Our collective time at Kettering Town has come to an end.  We'd like to thank the board and all the managers for giving us the chance to be disappointed most weekends.  Our mutually agreed departure gives us the chance to look at options moving forward that may or may not include trips to B&Q, National Trust joint memberships and lunch with the in-laws.  More than likely though we'll all be spending every other weekend in either Harborough or Wellingborough.  Either way, we're gonna have to get used to wearing an awful lot more yellow than we've been used to...."

Speaking on behalf of our new supporters, former fan Anus McLintock of Brigstock also took to Twitter to say -

"On behalf of the new fan base I can only express how excited we are to be joining the club at this crucial time of the season.  I used to be a supporter back in the day, and can remember as if was only yesterday the day we were relegated out of the Football League, blowing a 73 point lead in the League with only 3 games to go, being denied entry into the Premier League on the grading of the stadium and winning the World Cup at Wembley.  I'm really looking forward to supporting "The Cherries" once again and cheering the lads on at a sold-out Rockingham Castle."

"Kettering Town on hold for Ron Atkinson...?
Sorry mate, wrong number.  Do you need a cab...?"


1 comment:

  1. Second throw, third throw. Just make sure it's short throws!

    ReplyDelete