Saturday, 28 November 2015

Salford City Saturation and one from the Class of '09

Is it ok to admit to already being a little bit fed up of hearing about Salford City? A couple of years ago, they were barely known even in non league circles, now they’re about to have their second televised live game in a month, hot on the heels of a fly on the wall documentary series.  I have to remind myself it’s just a stirring tale of a little part-time club that just happen to have five multimillionaire owners. Us, we’d settle for just three.  Ok, two.

Joking aside, this clearly isn’t a vanity project for the famous five.  The setting could hardly be less glam, and watching from the kind of unmade spectator banking we know all too well, there’s no sign of playing to the camera as the Nevilles, Giggs, Butt & Scholes watch their semi pro heirs. Scholes in particular looks so down to earth, you expect him to pull out a flask of tea.    

Salford won promotion last season but it wasn’t an easy journey. A new management duo was installed as the challenge faltered – a novel ‘bad cop, even badder cop’ combination that is 10% motivation, 90% swearing. Hilariously, two nights before a “big game” against Lancaster City, the team were allowed a night out, but with a 2 drink limit.  The management duo soon realised this wasn’t being strictly adhered to. Imagine!

Inevitably, having had maybe 3 small glasses of wine or an extra Peroni the lads were off the pace on the Saturday and the dugout Kray twins delivered a blast that was straight out of Mike Bassett in bleep count.  “That was an absolute f***ing disgrace – and that’s constructive by the way”.

But good to see old boy Gareth Seddon in the home dressing room and sneaking the odd important goal.  We even got to see inside his personal museum, a little less grand than the Rooney version, with a Poppies shirt hanging next to the door.  Who says our TV days are over?  In many ways Seddon was the star of the show – chirpy, cheeky and the one player who dared to argue back when Ronnie and Reggie were in full flow. He’s now also a model, apparently, and seems to have gained a lot more ink since leaving Rockingham Road, including what looked like The Lord’s Prayer across his chest. That or the lyrics to American Pie.

And so the Salford story rolls on to Hartlepool and another Friday night in which the casual viewer can play FA Cup cliché bingo. God help us if they get through and draw Man Utd.  The BBC will probably give them a Christmas Day special.

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