In a surprise development, it has emerged that the Scottish referendum will include the people of Corby.
And if the Scots vote for independence, they will get Corby as part of the deal.
“Two can play at that game”, said a Government spokesman, “and we look forward to seeing the expression on Alex Salmond’s face when he finds out what a shit hole it is”.
“In fact, even if the Scots vote no, we will ask England to vote yes to get rid of Corby.”
Alex Salmond is understood to be reflecting on the news.